Film
Our Idiot Brother
Aug 27th
Our Idiot Brother is good not great. It got a few giggles from me, but it’s not a memorable flick.
Paul Rudd ditches his uptight, regular guy schtick to play Ned, a hippie that means well but is too naive about the world to get anything right. After selling marijuana to a uniformed police officer (I’m sure you’ve all seen this in the trailer by now), Ned serves time in prison. But once he gets out, his girlfriend has moved on with a new man and Ned is forced to find a new home. Oh, and she’s taken his beloved dog, Willie Nelson.
In a succession of couch-surfing, Ned lives with each of his three sisters. Liz (Emily Mortimer) is a loving mother, Miranda (played by a brunette Elizabeth Banks) is an ambitious writer at Vanity Fair magazine, and Natalie (Zooey Deschanel) is a bisexual hipster living with her girlfriend, Cindy (Rashida Jones). And, one-by-one, Ned manages to mess up their lives.
The concept is good and Rudd proves, once again, that he has killer comedic chops. There were, however, two things that left me scratching my head. First of all, did the costume department really have to stick Rashida Jones in such a distractingly bad outfit? Short-sleeved shirts tucked into Bermuda shorts, cinched with a belt and topped off with horrible ’70s plastic eyeglass frames. Actress Jones described the look, saying, “I think her look was more preppy, like edge of irony, but not fully in irony. It was a definite hipster Urkel.”
The other thing that left me baffled was the screen time given to Hugh Dancy. When the actor first appeared, I barely recognized him; He was pulling a Joseph Gordon-Levitt look and it suited him! Dancy played Christian, an artist complete with scruff and spectacles. And, although his character causes significant drama in the flick, he barely has any lines! Disappointing.
Overall, I’d say Our Idiot Brother lives up to expectations. It’s silly, enjoyable and a feel-good flick. Nothing spectacular, but hardly a dud.
How to Attract a Vampire
Aug 8th
Based on Twilight (2008) and The Vampire Diaries.
You’ve watched the films and TV shows, and noticed that vampires are gorgeous, intelligent and romantic. So, now you want to snag yourself a vampire boyfriend. But how do you attract those elusive undead men? It’s easy, here’s how:
Edward can't resist Bella's stench.
Appearance
Long brunette (natural or dyed) hair.
Skinny.
Simple, casual clothes (jeans, camisoles and zip-ups are wardrobe staples.)
An irresistible blood scent (granted, that’s a little beyond your control.)
Bonus points if his former lover is your doppleganger. You’re a shoe-in if that’s the case!
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Personality
I never smile, because I'm never happy. Cheer me up, vampire?
Have the personality of cardboard.
Talk in a breathy voice.
Never show enthusiasm for anything.
Be an introvert. He digs that.
Act miserable. He’s looking for someone he can cheer up.
Don’t have any hobbies or interests aside from your vampire heartthrob.
Do not be ambitious. He’s not looking for a girl who wants to achieve something on her own.
Home Life
Have M.I.A. parents (Bella didn’t really know her dad when she moved in and Elena’s parents are dead.) No vampire likes an overprotective mom hanging around!
Live in a small town. Vampires are drawn to cutesy communities surrounded by forests that have a weird amount of fog.
Oops, I'm so clumsy!
Interaction
Awkwardly gaze at your vampire love interest any time you can.
Vampires like clumsy girls, so “accidentally” walk in front of a truck any time you get the opportunity. If he likes you, he’ll save you.
Don’t act all “freaked out” when he tells you his secret. It’s not a big deal.
Be open-minded about becoming a vampire yourself. If you want a long-term relationship, you really have to take the plunge.
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If you follow the criterion, you’ll snag yourself a swoonworthy vampire in no time!
Rise of the Planet of the Apes
Aug 7th
I’ve been looking forward to Rise of the Planet of the Apes for quite some time. I enjoyed the 1968 flick and felt that, if any classic film needed a prequel, this was it. Planet of the Apes left viewers with so many unanswered questions that it almost demanded a starting point. I have never seen the follow-up films from 1970-1973 (Beneath the Planet of the Apes, Escape from the Planet of the Apes, Conquest of the Planet of the Apes or Battle for the Planet of the Apes), the reason being that I did watch Tim Burton’s 2001 flick and wasn’t crazy about it- so I put the franchise on the back burner.
Fast-forward 10 years and a fresh take on Planet of the Apes surfaces. It has all the right ingredients for a great film (great plot, great writing, great cast), but does this prequel stand its ground against the original?
It certainly has a strong cast, which includes James Franco, Freida Pinto (as the love interest), John Lithgow, Andy Serkis and Tom Felton.
James Franco stars as Will Rodman, a scientist tirelessly working on a cure for Alzheimer’s Disease, which his father, Charles (played by the incredible John Lithgow), suffers from. Rodman tests his creation on a female chimpanzee named Bright Eyes and the result is astonishing. But when the researchers try to remove Bright Eyes from her cage – to demonstrate her increased intelligence – the chimpanzee goes bananas (too easy?), putting humans in danger.
"I really don't know how I feel about having a pet ape, dear"/ "Well that's too bad, I'm James Franco, I do what I want."
The researchers are instructed to put Bright Eyes and the other test chimpanzees down and, after the deed is done, they learn that Bright Eyes’ rampage was a result of maternal instinct- she had given birth and was hiding her offspring. Unable to put down the little ape, Rodman takes the cuddly creature home and names him Caesar (Andy Serkis.)
Rodman quickly discovers that Caesar is unlike any natural ape, his intelligence is far superior to that of most newborns. It is obvious that the tiny ape inherited his mother’s intellect.
Encouraged by Caesar’s mind, Rodman gives Charles the medicine, as he can no longer watch his father’s mind deteriorate. Charles’ condition drastically improves, but, sadly, his body’s immune system fights back and the disease returns. While in a state of dementia, Charles damages a neighbour’s car and, when the neighbour yells at him, Caesar attacks the man.
Caesar is taken away and put into a cruel primate facility. Tom Felton leaves Draco Malfoy (Harry Potter) behind for a new villainous character named Dodge Landon, the guard of the facility and the owner’s son. He’s a nasty man who’s set on making the ape miserable while away from home.
Kudos to me for scoring the first, major post-Potter gig
Will Caesar get rescued from the primate facility? Will the ape fight back? Will the cure for Alzheimer’s work? You’ll have to check it out to see!
But I can answer one question: does this prequel stand its ground against the original? I do think Rise of the Planet of the Apes holds its own against the 1968 film, but I also think nothing can compare to the original.
One thing I preferred with the original is that the apes were played by humans, which made the film more realistic. In Rise of the Planet of the Apes, the apes are special effects, which made it difficult to connect with them. When the flick started, I found it so glaringly obvious that they were not real animals that it was hard to buy into the story. But it soon became apparent why Rise of the Planet of the Apes demanded special effects and, very quickly, the creatures became real in my eyes.
Rise of the Planet of the Apes puts up a good fight against the original and is definitely worth seeing. I enjoyed it and I think it is a welcome addition to the Planet of the Apes franchise. And, as a tip, don’t leave right when the credits role- there’s a clip that will explain how humans became weaker.
Are the other Apes films worth seeing? Did you enjoy Rise of the Planet of the Apes? Do you think John Lithgow is cool beans? Tweet me @LAMcEachran.